“ Separating is not failing, it's choosing to move forward when staying together is no longer an option .”

 

Separating consciously: a decision that deserves reflection

 

Separating isn't simply about signing a paper or packing suitcases. It's one of the most profound and delicate decisions a woman can make. Often, it comes after sleepless nights and secret tears.

 

As a family lawyer, I walk alongside many women who come to my office with fear, confusion, doubt, and guilt. Because behind the pain and uncertainty, many long to rediscover themselves, live in peace, and especially protect their children, and why not, themselves.

The most important thing in this process is: not to walk alone, or blindly.

 

This article isn't meant to tell you whether you should stay or leave. That decision is yours. But I do want to help you understand some legal, emotional, and practical aspects you should consider before taking that step .

 

In Guatemala, many people use the terms "separation" and "divorce" interchangeably, but they are not the same. Understanding the difference is key, especially when there are children, shared assets, or legal decisions to be made.

 

Separation: when they no longer live together, but are still married

 

Separation occurs when a couple decides to stop living together, but they are still legally married. This can happen informally (verbal agreement) or legally (through a notary or a judge).

 

Example:

 

Ana and Luis decide to live in separate houses because they no longer get along. Although they each lead separate lives, they are still legally married, so they cannot marry someone else.

 

 

 

 

Divorce: when a marriage is legally dissolved. That is, after a divorce, both people cease to be spouses in the eyes of the law and can remarry if they wish.

 

 

And if there are children, what happens?

 

The law protects the best interests of the child. Therefore, every separation involving children must address:

 

·      Custody and guardianship

·      Visitation schedule

·      Child support

 

 

I recommend that all of this be put in writing and ideally authorized by the family court judge. Verbal agreements are not sufficient.

 

 

Cases that illuminate realities

 

1.    Sandra, 34 , decided to leave after years of psychological abuse. Fear of what others would say held her back for years. But when her daughter asked if it was normal for her father to yell at her so much, she understood that staying also came at a price.

 

2.    Marta, 42 , impulsively separated from her ex-husband without consulting anyone or seeking information. She didn't request alimony, didn't formalize custody arrangements, and now her ex-husband is suing her for abandonment and fighting for custody of the children; he isn't providing any child support. In this case the process is more complex than when acting with planning.

 

Separating doesn't just change your marital status: it affects your emotions, your financial stability, and your children's lives. That's why, before making this decision, it's essential to be informed.

 

Here's a checklist for you to have on hand if you're considering a separation:

 

• Am I sure this decision is for well-being and not impulsive?

• What do I want for myself and my children in the next 5 years?

• Do I have a clear understanding of my current financial situation?

• Do I know how much I need monthly to cover my children's expenses?

• Do I know my rights as a mother, wife, and woman under Guatemalan law?

• Have I consulted a legal professional before speaking with my partner?

• Do I have a safe place to live if I have to leave home?

• Do I have a plan to emotionally protect my children during the process?

 

Separating isn't a failure. It's sometimes the bravest way to say, "This isn't good for me anymore." The important thing is not to make decisions in the midst of an emotional storm, but to seek support, get informed, and act wisely.

 

If this article resonates with you, remember: you are not alone . And if you decide to stay, let it be out of love, not fear. And if you decide to leave, let it be with your head held high, fully aware of your rights and responsibilities.

 

 

It's not easy. It won't be. But it is possible to make firm, conscious, and legal decisions to protect yourself and those you love.

 

Do you have questions? Do you need legal guidance in Guatemala?

 

Write to me, I'm here to help you.

 

Annie Tello

anabtello@gmail.com

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